Be patient baby

So I can’t force it. My “rhythm reflection” writing aka poetry. I don’t like it when this happens. In the past when it has, I go dormant for a long period of time. I am content. I have to be to be out in this world that doesn’t mean anyone any good. I am content knowing that one day I will be where I want to be. I will be where I am supposed to be. My grandma got married and pregnant @ 16. She didn’t graduate high school until she was in her 20’s. She had nothing growing up, and she made sure that I understood that patients is a virtue. She went to college and graduated I would say in her 30’s. My grandfather raised my mother in the beggining of her life, because she was working and living out of town to go to school. She was a social worker, and she was good at it.
I remember when I would be with her at her house, mainly at her kitchen table. *She would sit there and read*. That’s all she did was read. That’s where I get it from I assume. Anyway, she would tell me stories about how when she was little *she had numerous brothers and sisters* my great grandparents had nothing. It hurt her pride that when she had to go to school that she had to borrow crayons from other kids. You know that knot that you get in your throat when you hear something you don’t want to hear? Well her stories made me choke. Her antidotes always brought tears to my eyes. Her life wasn’t easy in the beginning. She had to struggle. She walked..and she walked everywhere she had to go, until her steps lead her to where she stood..until she died.
She made sure we had everything. She is the reason people call me spoiled. She is the reason I don’t believe in the word “no”. My grandfather died 4 yrs before I was born, so basically she held it down by herself. She was beautiful. Not just on the outside *because she was gorgeous and flyy. She could dress her behind off* I know I get that from her. She had a wonderful spirit. People gravitated to her. I see a lot of myself in what she was. She didn’t put up with nonsense. She was very intelligent, and made sure you knew it. She went to every continent except Antarctica and Asia. A well seasoned woman, and even though I haven’t traveled the world yet. I have the interest to because I want to walk in some of the places she did. She really didn’t have any female friends. When we went on our vacations she always had her male friends show us around. She warned me somewhat of the evilness that lies with in ourselves. *women* How jealousy and envy can ruin love, no matter how you cut it. She taught me not to trust too many people..even though I don’t think I really got that lesson until now.
I was just thinking of her a lot today because it seems like I won’t be graduating until I don’t know when. My tuition is due tomorrow, and I ain’t got it. I know it took her what seems like eternity to get to where she dreamed to be. But the point is..she got there. She was a real McCoy *you know the one’s from Tennessee*..and I have their blood..and they were no joke. So I will make it, no matter how long it takes. I am just going to enjoy the ride..praying not to get nauseous.

Yeah I got this one out in the end..

You held me first
You told me
I felt like warm clay
You washed my
Jet black hair
August 8th
12:00 pm..something
The day I was born

She didn’t touch me
Until after you did
Even though I hatched
From her egg
You were the first
To feel me breathe
And to hold my hand

As I grew older
I looked up to you
Understood the struggle
Didn’t understand how
You made it through
All of the pain
That life ached you with
Without popping pills
Because of being deemed insane
Without doing drugs
Without drinking a thing

Such a strong woman
I’m proud to have your genes
I wish you could be here
To see my baby
And not be buried
With her ultra sound pic
But she looks like you
Especially her hair
Straight like yours
And curly at the ends
But I know you are looking
Down on us
You were an angel on earth
But now you’ve got your wings
Willie Lee
Such a strong name
You were such a lady
Thanks for helping
To shape and mold me
Into the woman I am today
And for showing me………
That you really never
Stop growing
and for telling me
"Be patient baby"