So..The first day after a "tragedy" is always a test for me.
My mind races...thoughts go a mile a minute. Most not pleasant.
I hardly ever cry...unless the shit hits the fan..
I did a lot of that on Friday..
Then I talked to a couple of my "friends"..
One of my girls who I've known since I moved down here told me "Losing a job ain't shit. I got fired from almost every job that I've had". Then she went down the list of what jobs and why. She is too funny, so all I could do was listen and picture her in the moment of being terminated. I felt like I had company.
Then one of my guy friends texted me this morning..I told him I got fired..and he texted back "Why is it so hard for you to keep a job?... I texted back "??"..I wasn't able to go back to sleep. This was @ 7:00 am. I know..I know..ya'll are thinking I let ppl get to me. Well at least I realize that..and I can work on it. But more than him getting to me. I realized that what he said is the truth.
Nonetheless, I have been sending my resume out...we'll see what happens.
On the day that I got fired. I was listening to a radio station down here, and they were talking about losing their job. All of them agreed that if they lost their job today, that they would be fine because they still had their family. Bull shit I say..because if you don't have a job..how can you take care of your family. With the economy being a piece of shit now..it is harder now to find a job. A good paying job. I know I have a requirement, and I will not work for less than I know I deserve. I will be miserable, and it will show in my job performance. Again..I realize this..therefore I can POSSIBLY control it. I worked as a hotel desk clerk for a lil while last summer, and the maids got paid less than us. Reminder me of house ni***** and field n******..yep..
Speaking of control..that is the hardest part for me. Seems as if I have little to none...Impulsitivity..used to be fun when I was younger. Even though back then it got me into worlds of trouble..but I was a kid, and I thought I would grow out of it. For the most part, I don't see myself wilding out like I did when I was a teenage..but I must say I do some stupid shit..Like not following my intuition. My intuition told me on that day..don't use the phone.....BUT I DID..and I always get slapped when I don't listen.
So I leave you with this..ppl listen to the vibrations that you get from the world around you..
Foia "F-w-aah"
About Me
- Foia
- I am a Mother, Teacher, Student, Model, Music lover, Eat all the time-r, and never gain any weight-er.. I am a poet, who doesn't follow the rules. I write my heart out literally. I will continue until my heart no longer has a beat. I love to read anything from Cosmo to Silvia Plath to *J. California Cooper*. I'm growing up, I don't want go to the club unless I'm working. *Go Cocktailers* I am a junior in college majoring in Communications/Journalism. I thought was going to teach, but then I realized I don't like to retain useless information.. I asst. teach at a Montessori school where I constantly catch colds. I love the kids though.Wit their bad asses! Back in the day I enjoyed long walks on the beach with my friends, but since I moved from Michigan to Atlanta where there is no beach at. All I can do is reminisce about stomping the sand from my flip flops as I walked into my mothers house. I don’t like math. In fact I loathe it. I was a Montessori child myself, and it made me that way. I am an advocate for mental health. Everyday I fight to break down the stigma. And I will keep going on and on because I love to write.
When I worked @ Motions Xmas time 07'
Check the boots..
6 comments:
It horrifies me to think I'll be moving to another state next month with no job prospects...hopefully the market is better there.
That is great advice; I too have been burned when I don't listen to that little voice that usually knows better.
Hey, we're only human. We make mistakes. It's how we pick up the pieces afterwards and what we learn from it that will make all the difference.
Things happen ok...That had nothing to do with "impulsitivity". You were simply handling your BI and somebody felt they had to tell. I could see if you went off and left the kids but you didnt. I know it sucks to be in a state to were all your chips are down but you got to get back out there and grind. We all are predestine for good things no matter what transpires in our lives....
"but I must say I do some stupid shit..Like not following my intuition. My intuition told me on that day..don't use the phone.....BUT I DID..and I always get slapped when I don't listen."
Girl, me too! If a hard head makes a soft behind, then my behind is mush! I used to go against the grain so much when I was little and I still do. I'm impulsive when it comes to finances and excessive spending and with economy, I need to save every penny I touch, yet, I can't seem to stop blowing money like I'm P.Diddy...
I guess people like us, just love learning lessons the hard way! Stay Strong!
doll,
we all do some stupid sh*t, if we can admit, whether we are woman or man enough to admit it is key. You have a powerful testimony, though you've been through trails you will not give up. You just said you'll put that resume out there and when you find the perfect job for you, you'll know it until then sometimes we have to find our fit.
And you are exactly right about "listening to vibrations" from the world, because it's real, some people don't believe that, I do, I have visions, have different intuitions about people and I've not been wrong yet, that's God protecting us.
Don't let anyone get to you, I'm sure he was just inquiring in a friendly way.
I was listen to those little vibrations and they drive me crazy! lol
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