My parents still don't know..

How would I begin?
Where would I start?
Maybe with my first hospitalization
Or trying to crash my car?
How I flip the script
And start throwing shit around
And how I’ve cut myself a couple of times
This shit is deep
And my secret I feel I should keep
Because I don’t think they need to know
That their daughter is mentally ill
Not right now at least

I already know how this will go
I’ll tell you what’s up
If you won’t try to alter my footsteps
Down the roads I choose to go
Because I don’t want to be treated different
Please treat me the same
It’s not your fault
And I’m not here to place blame
But I have Bipolar
Which causes me to change
From the daughter you gave birth to
Into someone my kids father named
Foia
Not a split personality
Just changing character traits
From high to low
All day every day
A rapid cycle
Is how my spirit is traveling
In times of extremely high stress
I’m a mess
Get all teary eyed
And bust out crying
When I never cry
Not even when it’s appropriate
When a certain “someone” presses my buttons
It’s over and done with
I don’t even think
I’ve picked up several dishes
And have broken them
The biggest thing right now
Is to show you how I’m okay
As long as I’m medicated
I actually feel better
When I don’t have to deal w/”her”