Notebook Privacy

My notebooks are extremely private to me. I’m kinda looking at my blog as the same thing. I have a myspace blog where I post general poems or essays that I write, that really don’t have too much to do with me personally. They are all my “friends” and I don’t know how they would feel if they knew certain things about me. I know I shouldn’t care, but I do. I’m really enjoying this bloging thing. My daughter’s father is very popular on this site. He doesn’t know about my blog, and I hope he doesn’t find out. Because most of this stuff I put out here, he would flip if he read it. He’s an author himself, but I don’t know why he doesn’t understand that everything I write about especially in my poems aren’t all about me. I have a very creative mind, and he seems like he can be the only one good at writing. We have the rockiest relationship. It is very volatile, and I have been advised by my trusted therapist to stay away from him if possible. Bad things have happened between us. My notebooks have caused some conflict. He has a PhD and writes just like a physician, so when he jots down things I can’t read it because it looks like scribble scrabble. He feels the he can just pick up my personal notebooks and read them. He always seems to find something he doesn’t like. So don’t read em I say. I don’t go to his blog. He always writes about me. Not forwardly, but he’ll talk about what a women should do, or what women don’t do. A few times he has written specifically about me, and people who know us, know that it’s about me.(He sends out an email with a link to everyone he knows) So I don’t even read it, because I don’t want to get upset. I think it’s the right thing to do. He bitches about it, and I don’t care. I will write until I can no longer breathe air. Yet again the saga continues.