By: Lateef McLeod

I saw a really good movie today that made me cry on BET of all places.I finally can watch a movie after I messed up my movie roll due to my fear at the time. It was called Lackawanna Blues..and it had yet again an all star black cast. Macy Grey, the Black captain *shame I don't know her name* but she is on Law and Order, and Terrence Howard. The *captain* had a boarding house, and she took in this little boy because his momma and daddy weren't fit to take care of him in her eyes. She did what was best for him. But I can't imagine leaving my baby behind..so it brought tears to my eyes..Anyway the *captain* took in everyone she could.. I don't know if I would want a boarding house, but I do want to, definitely before I die have a non profit mental heath organization. It is a must...

I found this poem today on myspace on a disability advocacy page. I've heard about him before, but never took the time to read anything by him. But his name is Lateef McLeod, and is a writer from Oakland, CA who happens to have cerebral palsy. I think this poem is beautifully written..and basically made me swallow..
***when I copied and pasted it from myspace the line breaks were no more...but i think i broke it right..i hope so..if not..I apologize*

by: Lateef McLeod copyright 2007

Swallow
You say to me
And I really do try
Cuz I be wearing tight fits
Like Rocawear jeans, big Ekco shirts, Gap hoodies
And when I am really
GQ in tailor made suits
And drool does not go with a tailor made suit
You know I try to look suave 24 7
So there shouldn’t be a problem with me swallowing, right?
Well I have to remember to swallow
Every minute
Every hour
Every day
That means when I roll down the street
Swallow
Whenever I talk to someone
Swallow
When I exercise
Swallow
When I go to school
Swallow
Cuz I don’t want anyone to see me drool, especially you
You always say that it makes me look gross
And It is not my attention to gross you out
So I try to swallow like a mad man
I (swallow)
Try and (swallow)
Consciously do something
(swallow)
That everyone else
(swallow)
Does unconsciously
(swallow)
And you still
(swallow)
Can’t understand
(swallow) Why
(swallow)
Can’t I
(swallow)
Learn to swallow
(swallow)
All the time
(swallow) It is like
(swallow) To toss you a tennis ball
(swallow)
Telling you
(swallow)
To throw it
(swallow)
The air and catch it
(swallow)
Every 15 seconds
(swallow)
And yell at you
(swallow)
When you drop the ball
Swallow
Just swallow
Come on and swallow
You know you want to

http://www.myspace.com/sinsinvalid

So the writers on this website are mostly all physically disabled. Where as when it is "mental" people can't see it, and there for have a hard time understanding. I know from wanting to be a special ed teacher that people with any type of disability doesn't want to be treated any different. No one wants to be pitied.

People kill me when and if they find out that I have bipolar. "Fallon it doesn't seem like it. Nu-uh." I am usually my jovial self. But the people who contribute to sinsinvalid basically have no choice. They where a badge everyday. That is heroic.